Marriage, divorce and millennials: wedding culture

“I haven’t got any so far.” “I’ve got one, but I had three last year.” “Three for me, and one’s in France.”

If you’re in the millennial age bracket (those currently between 28 and 43 years old[1]) – you’ll likely be having  some variation of this conversation with friends. In case you couldn’t guess, the subject of the conversation is always the same: wedding invitations. 

The wedding invitation conversation usually has other details: What venue have they chosen? Have you seen the ring? Is there going to be an open bar? It is estimated that the average wedding in the UK costs over £20,000 – up 12.5% on average from the previous year. With the average salary for millennials being between £30,000 and £40,000 per year[2] – this can represent the lion’s share of a couple’s income.

It therefore begs the question – do young people place more value on the wedding than the marriage itself?

We live in a culture that puts a lot of emphasis on weddings: that a magazine even exists to tell brides how much they should be spending on their wedding is just the tip of the iceberg. Worldwide, there are numerous ‘bingeable’ TV shows dedicated to wedding culture, from mainstays Don’t Tell the Bride to Say Yes to the Dress to newcomers Married at First Sight and Love Is Blind, and ending with a wedding has been a staple of romantic comedies for years (although to be fair to the genre, this is actually one of the rules of comedy going back to the Greeks).

Recently married Becky and Pete, both in their early twenties, don’t think marriage should be defined by a wedding. "The wedding is just the icing on the cake," Pete says. Becky agrees, adding, "it would be just as nice if people all brought a dish, rather than expecting to be fed". The trouble is, not everyone shares their views. Recent data from Barclays[3] suggests that one in ten couples spend more on their weddings due to the pressure from social media – the use of which is an everyday feature in the lives and loves of millennials. However, many young people are choosing not to marry because they can’t afford the cost of a lavish wedding – even more impacted by our current cost of living crisis.

Could it be that placing the emphasis on the wedding rather than the marriage is what’s causing millennials to fall out of love with marriage?

Well, perhaps. There’s certainly an odd disparity between our obsession with weddings and the fact that millennials are less likely to commit to any relationship, let alone a marriage. However, recently engaged Josh doesn’t think this theory holds much weight when it’s actually put to the test: "Weddings are lovely, I’m sure I’m going to enjoy mine no end, but if I just wanted a party I’d have a party. I proposed to Sarah because I want her to be my wife – honestly, us young ‘uns are not as stupid as everyone likes to think".

It can be helpful to have the advice and guidance of a family law expert if you are considering getting married. Vardags has a dedicated team of highly-experienced family lawyers who are adept at providing tailor-made advice to meet your needs, as well as safeguarding and representing your interests in and out of court (e.g. drafting prenuptial agreements). We offer a free consultation with one of our experts, so please do get in touch with us to arrange a meeting.

 

 

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[1] In 2024

[2] ONS Annual Survey for Hours and Earnings from November 2023

[3] "Cost-of-loving crunch? How Brits are spending and saving on weddings in 2023” by Barclays on 01 August 2023